5/1/2015

Advice to my graduating son

   Son, it’s hard to believe it has been 18 years since you came into this world crying. But upon hearing my voice, you hushed and flashed a little smirk and half grin that amazed the nurse and gave me my first taste of pride at being a father.
   Now 18 years and 48 days later, you will be graduating from high school. You will begin a new chapter in your life when you will leave for college, when you have a taste of freedom but still can rely on the security of Mom and Dad. You will find these times to be some of the best of your life, and will make friendships and memories to last a lifetime. But be careful. As you venture out into the world you will find that while it can be a wonderful and exciting place, it is also fraught with dangers.
   I’m going to give you a little advice to help you avoid some of the mistakes I and others have made. I hope you will heed it, for you will learn as you get older that your father was smarter than you thought.
   Read your Bible every day. When I went to college my grandmother gave me a Bible. In it she simply wrote, “This book will keep you from sin, or sin will keep you from this book. The choice is yours.”
   Go to church. You will find college and the world are full of temptations. The best way to protect yourself is to meet regularly with other believers. There is strength in numbers.
   Choose friends wisely. Don’t be friends with someone because he/she is rich, attractive, popular, drives a nice car or any other superficial reason. A friend is someone who should lift you up, help you out when you are down and not be judgmental but tell you the truth, even when you don’t want (but need) to hear it.
   Guard your heart. A good woman can help you achieve amazing things. Look no further than your mother and me for proof of that. There will be a time that you will find achievement is much sweeter when you have someone to share it with. But just as a good woman can lift you to accomplish great things, a bad one can tear a man down. Be careful whom you choose to give your heart to; it is one of the most important choices of your life. But, when you do give your heart away ...
   Love unconditionally and with every fiber of your being. Love doesn’t judge, it doesn’t keep a scorecard, it’s quick to forgive and slow to anger. When you find the right woman, love her without conditions until the day you die. Never waste a moment because tomorrow is not promised to you, only today.
   Do a kind act for a stranger every day. Do it anonymously. If they find out who you are, it doesn’t count.
   Always be home by 2 a.m. Nothing good ever happens after 2 a.m. Be in bed by then!
   Lastly, stay true to yourself. I gave you space to become the man you are today. Though you choose a path different from mine, I am proud of the fact that you are comfortable with yourself, regardless of what others think (even your mother). Whether wearing your brown fedora and bomber jacket in winter (think Indiana Jones) to your summer white cotton jackets and linen pants (a la Miami Vice), you let the snide remarks and jokes roll off your back. You are a man who is comfortable enough not to need the affirmation of others. That is a wonderful trait to possess and it will serve you well. For throughout history, any man that has achieved great things has done so while others ridiculed him and called him a fool.
   Watching you grow up has been some of the happiest years of my life. I will be sad to see you go, but it is the cycle of life, time for you to leave and find your own destiny in this world. Just remember two things: I am proud you are my son and I love you.

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